Why ObamaCare Will Be Good For You!!

Several of you have asked, how exactly do the Democrats plan to sell this health care monster to the public? Well, believe it or not, they do have a plan. A little while ago, they started circulating the game plan. Here it is. At the end, I’ll tell you why it won’t work.

The Democrats will, of course, start by letting you know that. . .

The current system is broken. Greedy doctors and evil insurers have stood too long in the way of much needed reform. In fact, the current system was heading toward bankrupting our country, and it left millions of Americans to die without health care. Even those who had health care were just one job change away from losing their benefits or one rotten insurer away from being left hung out to dry.

Notice that the first sales point has nothing to do with the new bill, it’s just an attack on the existing system, and not even an honest one. The fact is that only around 2% of the American population cannot get insurance, for financial reasons or because they are uninsurable. Bankruptcy puts a floor under your debt burden. Few doctors are greedy, at least not as much as the people wanting to take what they have. And it’s the misguided Medicare program that is going broke, not the country as a whole. We could fix that without punishing everyone else. . . but where’s the fun in that?

Next the Democrats will tout the benefits of their monster: Access to affordable care for the poorest of Americans and for people with pre-existing conditions!

Of course, the poorest already get Medicaid, so this is false solution. Secondly, they fail to tell you that unless you’re poor, then you will be paying more for health insurance or you’ll be fined. As for pre-existing conditions, yes those people will be covered. . . by you. So rather than finding a real solution that problem, we’ll just hide it.

This bill closes the gap in the Medicare Part D Drug Benefit!

Yep, by bankrupting the rest of Medicare and killing Medicare Advantage. Think of it this way, this is like fixing that too tight shirt, the one with the buttons you can’t close, by ripping a huge whole in the back of the shirt. Problem solved. . . Democratic style.

This bill puts an end to Medicare fraud!

Hurray! Just like how we ended murder when we made it illegal. Of course, you might find yourself slightly inconvenienced as the boys at the FBI start calling you about your bills because they’re doing a random audit and they think you or your doctor just might be criminals. But that’s a small price to pay for the end of fraud.

This bill prohibits insurers from requiring prior authorizations, and establishes an effective appeals process for coverage denials and claims!

Oh yes, more for trial lawyers to do! How sweet it is.

This bill protects your choice of doctors.

Which is actually an odd claim to make, as this isn’t really a benefit so much as a “it could have been worse, hurray!” Of course, there is the other problem too, that by “protects” they mean wiping out something you have now, but soon won’t.

There can be no lifetime or annual limits on coverage, you can never be turned down, you’ll never grow old, and you can always eat oatmeal.

Ok, you got me here. I can’t possibly see how it’s going to hurt anyone that everyone can now get as much “health care” as they want. Speaking of which, where did I put that prescription for daily therapeutic massage? Oh, and little Michael wants another nose job. . . and a sex change. Fortunately, those things grow on trees now, taxpayer funded trees.

This bill extends coverage to children until they turn 26.

Ok, we’re hitting the bottom of the barrel here. But at least, this will be great if you have an unemployed 26 year old living with you. . . the American dream at its finest.

”Free” prevention benefits.

That’s right, it won’t cost you a penny toward your deductible. So if you believe in the free lunch, then you’re in luck . . . and you’re a fool.

And best of all, the government will be looking out for you.

Yep, with the efficiency of the post office, the heart of the IRS, the manners of the DMV, and the budgetary restraint and fairness of Congress. You’ll love it, or else.

So why do I think the public isn’t going to buy this? Hmmm. Well, I can’t really come up with a reason. Maybe Marjorie Margolies can help. She was a freshman Democrat who lost her House seat in 1994 after voting for Clinton’s budget. She recently confided to the world that she thought she was safe because she had reached a point where she could explain her vote “in a fairly coherent cogent manner” in about “four minutes.” Unfortunately, she adds, her opponents figured out how to explain her vote in a few seconds: “she raised your taxes.”

I wonder how many minutes it will take for Democrats to go through the arguments above? And how long it will take to say, “they raised your taxes, drove your doctor out of practice, made you a criminal, destroyed Medicare, and raised your health care bill.”

Hmmm. A genuine poser. . .