Poor Eric Holder. He had to testify before a Congressional Committee where he stated that he didn't know nothing about nothing when it came to those secret subpoenas directed at those AP phone lines. His exact words were “That is not something that I have ever been involved in, or would think would be a wise policy." Well, before the week was out, another secret investigation surfaced. The Washington Post reported that Eric Holder personally involved in signing off on secret search warrant to investigate Fox News Chief Washington Correspondent James Rosen for...well...espionage.
Oops, didn't he just say that this was something he would have never been involved in? Well, it looks like he has some 'splainin' to do. And he is going to do it too. He has called a meeting on Thursday with all the news organization executives to discuss these investigations that he said he didn't know anything about. But here is the catch: He wants these meetings to be "off the record". You don't have to imagine exactly how THAT is going over. As of this post, both the NYT and the AP have declined to participate and I am sure there will be other news organizations that will follow suit.
Well, since this meeting will be off the record, there's nothing to stop us from reporting on what might go on, right?
[Well, as long as all of your taxes are paid properly and we don't use our real names]
So CommentaramaPoliticsians, on your marks, get set...GOOOOOOOOO! [I would have said "BANG", but that would probably send the ATF to my door...]
this guy really burns my butt. Isn't he the guy that put together the Clinton pardon of Mark Rich? Then there is New Black Panthers, allegations about directives for racially motivated decisions on what to prosecute, Fast & Furious. To me, if John Mitchell was indicted, so should Holder. Probably, in the end, he will resign, citing that the political attacks on him are a "distraction" to the agenda of his personal lord and savior." Greg Gutfield may have it right, Republicans are better off having him stay on as a tainted A.G., and keeping the media focused on this incredibly corrupt administration.
ReplyDeleteAdmit Nothing
ReplyDeleteDeny Everything
Demand Proof
Make Counter-Allegations
Blame a Scapegoat
Struggling to keep it clean... struggling to keep it clean... struggling to keep it clean...
ReplyDelete...losing
...losing
argggh.
Ok, how about this...
ReplyDelete"Can't we all just get along?"
I have heard from reliable sources that the "off the record" meeting will disclose that this was the fault of Holder's sight impaired secretary, who accidentally placed the offending document inside a stack of several DOJ lunchroom silverware requisition forms which he signed in a hurry at the end of the day.
ReplyDeleteThe secretary has been put on administrative leave to Disney World and promises that it will never happen again.
"Well, you see, it is all in how you define "knew". Do we really "know" anything, really? And, define "involved". But in my defense, they were asking about the AP thingy, not Fox News. Yeah I "knew" about that. I mean, we HATE Faux News, so what's the big deal? Oh, and it is A MATTER OF NATIONAL SECURITY! But we promise that it will never happen again. I will personally see to THAT, I tell you! [laughs nervously]
ReplyDelete"So yeah...there I was....sitting in my office, when all of a sudden the President shows up...no, not the President, the Chief of Staff, no wait, Valerie Jarrett, no..no...it was a 'low-level' clerk...yeah..that's the ticket....a 'low-level clerk'...shows up and hands me this paper to approve....no wait....not approve, sign,.....did I say sign?...I meant initial...and I didn't know what it was as I get dozens...no wait...hundreds....did I say hundreds...I meant thousands of papers coming across my desk every day....hour....minute. Yeah...that's the ticket......"I don't know nothing bout no subpeena and besides, a low level clerk handed me one of thousands of things for me to sign that hour. And that's the TRUTH.......to power. Yeah.....yeah
ReplyDeleteAn off the record meeting with a hostile press? Holder's lucky that those guys aren't showing up.
ReplyDeleteI think the only thing that has kept him from resigning is the fact that even an embattled AG has more power than a recess appointment (I doubt Republicans would let Obama fill the spot if Holder resigned).
" I thought you people were my friends, damn it!" ..... "and, I also thought you people understood that some richly deserved payback is implicit in what we told you was going to be a transformational presidency." .... Soooooo, I need you guys to be able to take a joke. It was never about the press, per se ..... we love you guys. No, I swear to god, we only would ever do this to those bastards that aren't hip to the bigger picture."
ReplyDelete"Also, I don't understand why my sincerity is open to question, any more than Anderson Scott's claims that he isn't trying to make civil war re-enactors look like racist rubes in his book 'Whistling Dixie' from the Wired article that shows up in the news feed of that openly conservative racist blog Commentarama Politics!"
ReplyDeleteAnd now the semantics begin.
ReplyDeleteWhat Really Happened:
ReplyDeleteAtty. Gen. Eric Holder: What are these?
Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly: Papers.
Holder: Blank papers?
Radar: Yes, sir!
Holder: Is that a good idea?
Radar: It's to cut down on your work load. You sign 'em now, later you don't have to bother.
Holder: But should I have really signed blank papers?
Radar: I can't answer that, sir. You're the one that signed 'em. I didn't.
TennJ - Yes, he's the one! Don't be too hard, he doesn't know what is going on anymore than the head of IRS, or the Sec't of State do. In any other world, "We didn't do it on purpose, we are just incompetent" wouldn't be a positive, job-securing statement either.
ReplyDeleteLL - I think those five things are actually chapters in the "Idiots Guide To: How to Protect President Obama And Save Your Own Butt..er, Career" manual they passed out in Jan. 2009.
ReplyDelete"Can't we all just get along?"
ReplyDeleteAndrew - This is probably Holder's opening statement! Btw - one of the few news executives who have agreed to meet with Holder today is HuffPo's Washington bureau chief, Ryan Grim. Does this surprise you?
Patriot - Maybe Jon Lovitz was coaching him! LOL!
ReplyDeleteAnthony - I think you may be on to something. We should insist that Holder stays until at least September of 2014 just so he can be pounded by Congress until then..well, and it may take that long for him to investigate himself and find that he did nothing wrong, but promised he won't do it again.
ReplyDeleteK- Yep, they are ALL about "semantics", aren't they?
ReplyDeleteTryanmax - I suspect that is exactly what happened! LOL! I can't wait for the 1/2 hour Sitcom based on the Obama Administration, can you?
Have I ever mentioned that I HATE Eric Holder?
ReplyDelete@#$%^&*@#$%^&*@#$%^&*
Bev...That sitcom wouldn't be "The Obama's" would it? "Moving on up...to the West Wing!"
ReplyDeletePatriot, Now I've got that song in my head!
ReplyDeleteBev, I'm not surprised. I am really stunned though that Holder thought he pull this off. This honestly reeks of "come on guys, help me out... let's plan a strategy!"
ReplyDeleteHopefully, the Fox News people will go and then make it on the record.
Patriot - It's so funny that there were 2 sitcoms during the Bush Admin, both with Bush in them portrayed as a moron in both - That's My Bush and L'il Bush. And then there's that dreadful "1600 Penn" this season (that was cancelled) with a white President. I have a funny feeling that they expected Romney to win. However they can't even depict a black President unless he is the hero even on SNL...it's just racist.
ReplyDeleteAndrew - If they had been doing their jobs, they should have all agreed to the terms, gone to the meetings and then publish/leaked every word. What's Holder going to do - arrest them ALL? Oh, yeah, he might or sic the IRS on them.
ReplyDeleteHey did you hear the one about IRS Chief head honcho Robert Shulman visited the WH 167 times 118 of those visits were during the time when the IRS was targeting the TP and other conservative groups? By contrast, the former IRS Honcho only visited the WH once in 4 years under Bush...hmmmmmm.
I'm not feeling very witty today.
ReplyDeleteIt wouldn't surprise me if this continues to get deeper if he didn't throw Obama under the bus. Especially if a) he gets a hint Obama is about to do that to him and b) he has an offer to work for a private firm already lined up.
I can almost picture it:
"Obama is insane! He threatened me and my family. Michelle showed up at my door with fresh arugula. ARUGULA!"
"I had nothing but Twinkies since 2008! I had a rare tropical disease that causes inattention and forgetfulness but I´m alright now. I AM GAY!"
ReplyDeleteKoshcat - LOL! Pretty witty for someone who isn't feeling very witty!
ReplyDeleteI can actually visualize Michelle chasing little children down the street with giant wads of arugula in both fists...now I'm gonna have nightmares...
El Gordo! THAT wins the prize! The Twinkie Defense strikes again! But haven't we seen the "gay defense strategy" with J. Edgar Hoover? Oh, wait, he was with the FBI...
ReplyDeleteEl Gordo... that just might work ! LOL!
ReplyDeleteEven people at HuffPo were slamming this off-the-record press conference. I can't for the life of me imagine who in the WH thought this would fly without notice. Of course, I can't imagine why they do a lot of the things they do.
ReplyDelete"By contrast, the former IRS Honcho only visited the WH once in 4 years under Bush..."
ReplyDeleteBev - that's because Bush and his Honcho weren't doing their jobs as well as TOTUS and Co. Everyone knows that TOTUS is much more capable and knowledgeable and omnipresent than all previous US Presidents combined.
Except, of course, when he's not.
In the good ol' days, when Billy Preston roamed the land, nothin' from nothin' used to mean 'nothin'. Nowadays, in the Obama era, seems to mean time for a promotion. How I long for those good ol', young boy, ways ...
ReplyDeleteBut rlaWTX - But then again, I don't remember Bush ever calling fellow citizens "the enemy" and then using the IRS to bully them. Not even the EEEVIIIIL Dick Cheney did that! But, do you remember during the Iran/Contra hearings and Reagan said he couldn't remember anything. And then once he left office , he was diagnosed with Alzheimers, so it is quite possible he really COULDN'T remember anything?
ReplyDeleteI think the same is happening to Obama. But this time it's his Teleprompter that's malfunctioned. But, as I have said before, I am not sure when "It wasn't done for political reasons, we are just totally incompetent" became an answer that didn't get you fired or laughed at or something.
EricP - Don't you know that the "good ol' days" never existed?
ReplyDeleteYouse guys is good at that. ROTFL :D
ReplyDelete>>Don't you know that the "good ol' days" never existed?>>
ReplyDeleteHigh schooler in the 80s, Reagan's second term. [drop mic and exit stage right-ish]
Eric, LOL! Damn straight!
ReplyDeleteDear Eric Holder,
ReplyDeleteDon't you just hate it when that happens.
Our Condolences,
Reality