Did Hillary Bump Uglies With Evil Genius Saul Alinsky?

The year is 1971. A young future Democratic presidential candidate pens a love letter to old Saul Alinsky. What's that? You know about Obama? I'm not talking about Obama. I’m talking about Hillary Clinton, and you gotta see this pathetic letter.

In 1971, 23-year-old law school student Hillary Clinton wrote a sycophantic letter to her then-crush, Saul Alinsky. Apparently, young Hillary wanted to be a community activist. She never did go that route however, because that’s for losers. Instead, she took the more accomplished path of marrying a man whose coattails she could ride.

Anyway, said letter was published last week by the Washington Free Bacon Beacon. Here are the highlights of her letter to old Saul (my comments in italics):

Dear Saul,

When is that new book [Rules for Radicals] coming out — or has it come and I somehow missed the fulfillment of Revelation? I have just had my one-thousandth conversation about [Reveille for Radicals] and need some new material to throw at people.

Does this sound like she’s mocking him? It does to me: “Gee you old fart, when’s your book finally coming out or did I somehow miss that you brought about the end of the world?” Sounds a bit like a taunt, like she's saying he can't finish his book or like he thinks way too much about the impact his book will have. In any event, is she really telling us that she gets all of her material from his one book from 1946? Doesn’t she read other books? Doesn’t she do independent thoughts? Apparently not.

[I] survived law school, slightly bruised, with my belief in and zest for organizing intact.

It is true that Hillary had a zest for organizing. In fact, she organized her closet before she sent the letter and later in the day, she would rearrange her silverware to be more efficiently dispensed by turning the forks against the spoons. ;-)

The more I’ve seen of places like Yale Law School and the people who haunt them, the more convinced I am that we have the serious business and joy of much work ahead, — if the commitment to a free and open society is ever going to mean more than eloquence and frustration.

Yeah, the ghosts at Yale suck -- they're much more positive at Hogwarts. She should try talking to the living people instead. It might have changed her entire world view. Also, talk about a blowhard. She needs to learn that you can’t impress people with store-bought words: keep it simple stupid. And for the record, anyone who thinks “work” and “joy” are synonyms is a crazy person... and probably drinks her own urine.

If I never thanked you for the encouraging words of last spring in the midst of the Yale-Cambodia madness, I do so now.

Yeah, it was crazy when Cambodia invaded Yale! In any event, it’s really bad form to try to send a catchall “thank you” years after the fact. It’s a good thing for her that she and Saul are such good friends and he will forgive her ill manners, or he might be offended. It does make me wonder what those kind words were, though: “Hey you don’t look as chubby as Bill says!” ... “Nice spelling on your protest sign.” ... “You smell purty, comrade.”

I am living in Berkeley and working in Oakland for the summer and would love to see you. Let me know if there is any chance of our getting together.

Huh. I’ve never received an invite to Oakland, but I wouldn’t be happy about it if I did: “Gee, Andy, wanna come to inner city Baltimore and see how long you last?” More interestingly though, am I sensing a little romance here? Hillary just invited old Alinsky, who smelled of cabbage and Soviet toiletries, to come spend some time with her to “get together.” I believe that is known today as “hooking up.” Let’s see what kind of moves the old girl has, shall we?

Hopefully we can have a good argument sometime in the future.

Um, no. That's not a great sales pitch: “Wanna go to Oakland so we can fight?! Welcome to the Thunderdome, ese!” Besides, why would Saul want to argue with Hillary anyways, knowing that she gets all of her material from his one old book anyway:

Hillary: “Do you remember when you wrote that? Hahaha.”
Alinsky: “Kill me.”

Talk about boring.

Interestingly, Saul did respond. Or rather, his secretary did because she knew there was a little somethin’somethin’ going on between the old fruit and the new squeeze, and that means juice:

“Since I know his feelings about you [he’s into chubby girls who dig his book] I took the liberty of opening your letter because I didn’t want something urgent to wait for two weeks. And I’m glad I did. [Your pathetic come on letter made me laugh.]”

“Mr. Alinsky will be in San Francisco, staying at the Hilton Inn at the airport on Monday and Tuesday, July 26 and 27. I know he would like to have you call him so that if there is a chance in his schedule maybe you can get together. [Wear something sexy.]”

One can only imagine the freak these two got on in that hotel room; please God, tell me there's no 8 mm sex tape! Anyway, Hillary claimed in 2004 that Saul offered her a chance to work with him after graduating from Wellesley College (Lic Kum Lesbianus), but she turned him down so she could attend law school. Saul never got over his disappointment and he died in 1971... possibly from the grief, possibly from events that transpired in the Hilton Inn in San Francisco, possibly from something else.

Speaking of the Hilton, isn’t Saul supposed to be a commie? What’s he doing with a secretary and staying at the Hilton? Hypocrite.

Anyway, I may have been a bit cheeky in my article, but let me be the first to officially freak out that Hillary Clinton is clearly the chubby embodiment of Saul Alinsky's dream to convert the US into a communist paradise. If she is elected, Saul Alinsky will rise from his grave and destroy the country. Panic!!! Panic!!!

Thoughts? Pretty pathetic letter isn't it? Kind of makes Hillary sound like a groupie... a brainless groupie who got all of her ideas from one book and who put her own greed ahead of old Saul's desire that she become a community organizer. Sad.