Obama’s Midas Touch

Like history, Greek tragedy repeats itself. You’ve heard the expression that someone has “the Midas touch.” That’s supposed to be a good thing, right? But in Greek Mythology, Midas is a tragic figure. When the god Dionysus offered Midas one wish, Midas asked that whatever he touched should turn to gold. This sounded great, until his food and drink started turning to gold. Later, in a version penned by Nathaniel Hawthorne, Midas even turns his own daughter to gold. Thus, the Midas touch is a cautionary tale of one who destroys all he touches. Obama has the Midas touch. Let’s look at some of his victims.

ACORN. The most obvious victim of Obama’s Midas touch has been ACORN, which announced yesterday that it will finally be shutting down. Before its involvement with Obama, ACORN could draw on 400,000 members for left wing causes. It was arguably the most successful organization at funneling federal funds to Democratic voters, getting away with voter fraud, and generally raping taxpayers. But after a one night stand with Obama, conservative activists infiltrated and Troy fell.

Manuel Zelaya. Manuel Zelaya placed himself into Obama’s hands and soon found himself playing the part of blind King Phineas, who lost his kingdom and was prevented from eating by Harpies sent by the god Helios. In this case, Zelaya found himself trapped in the Brazilian embassy, eating hot dogs, after losing his kingdom, as the Honduran Army harassed him. But unlike Jason, who saved Phineus from his fate, Obama left Zelaya to his.

Rahm Emanuel. Democratic Party high-flier Rahm Emanuel was a take-no prisoners up and comer in the Democratic Party. When Obama called upon Emanuel, Rahm saw his chance to add more feathers to his wings. So he guided Obama through the Labyrinth of Washington power. But like Icarus, Rahm was overcome by giddiness and flew too close to the sun, which made him a target for the frustration of other Democrats with Obama’s dithering. Now Rahm plummets to the earth, a burned, waxy mess. Look for Emanuel to quietly disappear from office after November.

Hillary Clinton. With a cold stare that could turn a man to stone, Hillary Clinton came within an eyelash of becoming the first female president. She was that important. But, for reasons unknown, Hillary accepted Obama’s offer and banished herself to the lonely island known as the State Department, where she became a sad, despised creature with bad hair. Now Obama sends challenger after challenger to usurp her authority and take Medusa’s power.

The Democratic Party. Who else has Obama left in his wake? How about the entire Democratic Party. They fell for his siren song and followed his lead as he plotted a course right between the Scylla and Charybdis of party politics: enraging his opponents and demoralizing his supporters. By vastly over-promising and pathetically under delivering, he has guaranteed that the party’s days are numbered. November will be the last hurrah of the Democratic Party as it smashes against the rocks of discontent to which Obama has steered it.

So there you have it, Greek tragedy brought to life by this very administration. Did I miss anyone?


Oh, and if you're wondering why there is no Joe Biden, the only parallel I could find was Moronicus, and he was a fool before he ever met the king.