According to Ellis Silver, an ecologist, humans are not indigenous to Earth. He claims the fact we have bad backs means we were designed on a lower-gravity planet, the fact we get sunburned means we came from a darker planet, and the fact humans have difficulty giving birth because babies have such large heads when no other species on the planet has the same problem means we ain't like everything else on the planet. Hence, we came from somewhere else.
Now, I would believe this theory 100% if it were not for the fact that he continues and claims that we were created when aliens, "perhaps from Alpha Centauri," crossbred with Neanderthals. Yeah, he loses me there. Look, first of all, everyone knows that nobody actually lives on Alpha Centauri... it's like Vegas, you just visit. Secondly, this is the same garbage the other alien conspiracy theorists spew. Apparently, aliens came to Earth, found our ancestors to be hot to trot, and did the nasty with them, resulting in us. Huh? I don't know about you but I've never once gone to the zoo and said, "You know, they are kind of cuddly, less breed with them" and I can't see any aliens deciding to bump uglies with the animals they found on Earth. Seriously, have you ever seen a Neanderthal? They aren't exactly swimsuit models.
37 comments:
Scott pointed this out earlier. If you haven't seen this, you should read about it. It's one of those great things humans sometimes do. :)
Batkid
I'm not buying the alien thing cross breeding thing. It would violate the prime directive. On a more recent note, today is the sesquacentennial anniversary of the Battle of Campbell's Station west of Knoxville. My great grand dad and his brother fought in this battle after having marched nearly 40 miles in a little over 48 hours. Their outfit, the 36th Mass. Was nearly cut off and surrounded, but fought their way through soldiers from Lafayeette McLaw's division to pull back to the safety of Burnsid's lines
OH, NO!! 10J, you're a d@mn Yankee?? How can this be? You seemed so nice...8-/
Andrew, that Batkid stunt almost redeems San Francisco. The fact that the entire city pulled that off..WOW! Even the newspaper got in on the act. And even Obama's tweets were great. He needed to do something right this week...
Bev, you clearly haven't been taking your Tea Party prescribed crazy pills. I'm sure you could find something wrong with Obama's tweets.
But seriously, that's pretty cool. I think it'd be awesome just to be the guy playing the Riddler. But my favorite part was that Graham Nolan illustration.
Good thing he didn't ask to be Spider Kid, though. Throwing bat-decals on a Lambo is one thing, wires and harness-rigging all over downtown is another. LOL
On the alien thing, it's not the births or the sunburns that proves we're not from around here. It's the clothes. Seriously, do you understand how ridiculous chinos look in the wild? Clearly our fashion sense is otherworldly.
Jed, I forgot about the Prime Direction! So true! ;-)
40 miles in 48 hours? Blech.
Bev, LOL! Yeah, with a name like "Tennessee Jed," you would think he was anything but a Yankee!
I think the Batkid thing is great and I do think it's cool that Obama played along. Moments like this really show the wonderful side of humanity. And that kid looks SOOO in this whole thing. The whole thing is one of those moments that remind us what humanity is capable of being.
tryanmax, do you understand how ridiculous chinos look in the wild? LOL! Clearly, we should return to tasseled jumpsuits!
In all seriousness though, these people actually do promote the sexy-monkey theory of how we got here and I just find that amazing. Unless the universe is full of hill billy aliens, there is no way they came here and bred with the locals. And just because we get sunburned and have bad backs just means poor design (or that we've evolved beyond our original design), it doesn't mean we're from somewhere else. Talk about poor logic.
BTW, MSNBC had to suspend Alec Baldwin after yet another homophobic comment. Ha ha. They're going to replace him with a test pattern, which should garner higher ratings.
I don't know if I can fully believe the alien theory, but it would explain Cher.
"Half-Breed!
That's all I ever heard.
Half-breed!
How I learned to hate that word.
Half Breed!
She's no good, they warned.
Both planets were against me since the day I was born..."
Hmm. Perhaps we should look for more clues in our culture?
"The only way the Ancient Aliens theory can be disproven is when the extra-terrestrials show up." -Giorgio Tsoukalos
"I don't understand how Hot Pockets work. Nobody does. The only explanation is Aliens!" -also Giorgio Tsoukalos
"I'm not saying it was aliens... but I am." - Giorgio Tsoukalos
You know that the "T" in "Model T" stands for?
Aliens!
I couldn't type that without breaking into laughter.
Kit, It's hard not to laugh at Mr. Tsoukalos.
But let's treat this seriously for a moment. Let us examine the theory under the professional rigors of science...
TWO CREATURES OF DIFFERENT SPECIES CANNOT PRODUCE OFFSPRING TOGETHER!!!!!!!
I know you see that on TV shows like Star Trek and Doctor Who (kittens!) but in real life its impossible. A Giraffe cannot have offspring with a zebra. Hell, a human cannot produce offspring with a gorilla! They could have sex but no little hybrid babies would result.
I expect an ecologist would know this since this is Biology 10-freaking-1.
Kit, Yes, but... they are aliens dontcha see?? Who knows what wonders they could achieve. They could build vaguely similar piles of stone into pyramids and teach people to scribble on walls. Surely, a species THAT advanced can find a way to crossbreed with monkey-boys if they find them, right?
But aliens have been impregnating women lots and lots of times. it's in the National Inquirer all the time. And I bet our monkey-boys made did it with alien girls that are on other planets too! Really, it't in the Inquirer...at the grocery store...how could that be wrong. Otherwise the FDA would have stopped it long ago, right?
Bev, Those are all good points.
That said, I wonder if the reason we don't see an aliens anymore (or almost never) is because they all died from VD after humping everything in the universe?
Scoff all you want at the idea of human/alien interbreeding, but as Mr. Tsoukalos knows, movies... don't... ever... lie...
Oh, sure, Mr. Tsoukalos would totally go along with this --but what if it was his daughter, huh??? Oh, that's something else again, eh, Mr. Tsoukalos? Sssssssssspeciesist!
Backthrow, True! They couldn't put it into a film if it wasn't true.
You know, Alpha Centauri used to be a pretty well-kept place back in the day. Then development opened up on Proxima Centauri, Vega stole a bunch of the tourist trade, and you had E.T.-flight before you knew it. So sad.
Please tell me this guy isn't a professional ecologist. Because that would be worrying if he is.
LOL! "E.T.-flight."
Yeah, I can't imagine he's legit either.
Bev - yeah, my ancestors were in a direct tussle with John Hood's old division. Command of that division was given to Micah Jenkins.
It's incredibly sad that the kid is now past treatment, but the Batkid story is beautiful.
Well, the guy apparently has a doctorate. In what I have no idea...
Anthony, I thought they said his cancer was in remission?
Kit, That's what he claims, but who knows. I find it interesting that this book generated any sort of media buzz when it's clearly garbage.
That's awesome. The article I read just stated his treatment had stopped in June without specifying why.
Andrew,
I think it got posted on the Daily Mail and after that it just went viral. I think there is a good deal of "Wow, there really are people this stupid."
Andrew, Kit, it appears that odd hair and unusual job titles are pretty much necessities in the field of strange science.
LINK (fast forward to 9:21)
Also, feel free to marvel at the 1970's oddities and alarmist observations throughout the episode.
Rustbelt, I love "In Search Of." It's completely 100% wrong, but it's entertaining as heck! And yeah, strange hair abounds! :D
Kit
It does happen in rare instances but the resulting offspring is usually male and sterile. The examples I know of are:
A Mule (Donkey and Horse)
A Liger (Lion and Tiger) - there are some in Naples Florida in a preserve there
As to humans and Gorillas - I don't think it has been tried but there was a chimpanzee that walked upright and had other differences which led to speculation that it might be a hybrid. However the show documenting it said that the scientists did a DNA analysis on its corpse decades later and determined it was not human but just a chimpanzee.
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