Sunday, April 16, 2017

North Korea Explained In Pictures

We have a treat today. I've broken down the issue with North Korea, because I know it's so hard to understand, and I'm going to explain it using actual pictures from North Korea. You can click to enlarge any image. This will be very explicative-ish.

Once upon a time, there was a sad kingdom filled with dwarves.

It was a lonely foggy kingdom full of people suffering tremendous punishments for misbehavior.

What kind of misbehavior? Nobody knew for sure, but they knew something was going on. Wink wink.

Yep, no idea at all...

Ouch! My colon!

Whatever this mystery cancer was, it was causing Korean society to fall apart. They couldn't dance.

The people were angry.

The people were scared.

They were confused.

Nothing made them happy.

Their lethargy and anger made them lazy and they built only one bathroom in the whole country!

Finally, the wise king made the decision to hand things over to his son.

At first, his son seemed like a fat pervert moron, but he turned out not to be all bad.

He taught the army to dance.

He gave the generals brand new rides!

He even introduced throwback Thursdays.

Suddenly, everyone was happy. The bakers were happy.

The cleaners were happy.

The wizards were happy.

The cleaners were happy.

And the people danced.

Now everything is going great. Everyone is happy.

No one is confused.

No one worries anymore about their leaders.

And next week, they're moving into a brand new Death Star... once their scientists figure out how to build it.

Yes, it is indeed a good time to live in North Korea. The only problem is that the evil Donald Trump wants to destroy their country and they don't have any pussy hats to stop him! Of course, they also tried to launch that missile and then couldn't get it up. That was a tad embarrassing. But hey, Korea is still a wonderful place.

Understand now? Any questions?

14 comments:

LL said...

You have out-done yourself!!!

AndrewPrice said...

Thank you, LL! :)

Critch said...

That was great....

AndrewPrice said...

Thanks Critch! I love the generals. Could you imagine seeing that on a battlefield? LOL!

Anonymous said...

Classic. Simply classic.
GypsyTyger

ArgentGale said...

LOL, awesome! Definitely what I needed on a crappy morning.

- Daniel

Critch said...

The North Koran Army has no combat experience, lots of training no doubt, but no real combat experience...South Korea and Japan both sent us help in Iraq and Afghanistan to season some troops. The North Koreans are a Potemkin Army, all fake....I really believe they will fold quickly.

BevfromNYC said...

Well, they are really great at postering! Kind of reminds me of tiny animals who puff themselves up really big to try scare away before becoming dinner...

AndrewPrice said...

I'm glad you all liked it! I think it explains a lot. :)

AndrewPrice said...

Bev, North Korea is run by a porn-addicted mad man, whom I suspect is winging all of this. He's basically convinced them that the world outside North Korea has suffered the zombie apocalypse and he's the only one who can keep them safe.

So in way, you are absolutely right. They are trying to puff themselves up. Unfortunately, their leader, on the other hand, seems to be seeking respect through fear. That's a bad combo.

AndrewPrice said...

Daniel, I hope your day has improved!

AndrewPrice said...

Critch, I agree. I think the Koreans will be positively stunned at how much destruction the American forces can cause if it comes to that. Right now, they think they can hold their own, but they can't. What happens when they finally experience that will be the question.

AndrewPrice said...

Thanks GypsyTyger. Not to make fun of a dangerous situation, but this one seemed to call for it.

shawn said...

Bev, North Korea is run by a porn-addicted mad man, whom I suspect is winging all of this. He's basically convinced them that the world outside North Korea has suffered the zombie apocalypse and he's the only one who can keep them safe.

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The only show he allows on Kim Jung Un T.V. is The Walking Dead. Tells the population that it's a documentary.

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