Oh no! Houston, we have a problem! A really big crisis is coming at us and if we don't do something quick, we will be in BIG trouble. Or should I say "Big Top" trouble.
In an exclusive report in the New York Daily News this morning, it was reported that there is an impending clown shortage! NOOOOOOOO! If the projections are correct, there won't be enough clowns to fill a tiny clown car. Who will buy the big red noses and floppy shoes? What will happen to the seltzer bottle and confetti-filled water bucket industry?
People, we CANNOT allow this to happen. Think of the children!! Think of Congress!! Who will we elect now??
Oh, wait, nevermind. Well, it looks like we just dodged a huge bullet, but just in case Congress...er, the clowns are lying, here is how you can help - LINK
But seriously, folks, if you have anything to say, now is your chance.
In an exclusive report in the New York Daily News this morning, it was reported that there is an impending clown shortage! NOOOOOOOO! If the projections are correct, there won't be enough clowns to fill a tiny clown car. Who will buy the big red noses and floppy shoes? What will happen to the seltzer bottle and confetti-filled water bucket industry?
People, we CANNOT allow this to happen. Think of the children!! Think of Congress!! Who will we elect now??
Oh, wait, nevermind. Well, it looks like we just dodged a huge bullet, but just in case Congress...er, the clowns are lying, here is how you can help - LINK
But seriously, folks, if you have anything to say, now is your chance.
18 comments:
"a little song, a little dance ... a little seltzer down your pants!" :)
Bev, As I understand it, our political class double as a Strategic Clown Reserve.
TennJ - Hardy har-har! [Auto-correct does not recognize that as a word...] ;-)
LOL!! "Strategic Clown Reserve" now THAT's...probably true. We call it the "Federal Government". I believe that the official plural for a group of clowns is a "Congress of Clowns".
Andrew, no fair winning the thread so early!
LOL! A Congress of Clowns. That is so fitting! :)
Here's something OT, but funny. Apparently The Guardian mistakenly identified Patrick Stewart as gay in an article about Ellen Page's coming out. I love his response on Twitter (just imagine it in his voice, it's hilarious).
. @Poynter But @guardian I have, like, five or even SEVEN hetero friends and we totally drink beer and eat lots of chicken wings!
Patrick Stewart (@SirPatStew) February 18, 2014
Major Update on My Article of the Other Day
Ann Coulter is now claiming that "Shysters" claiming to be Tea Party types are trying to hurt the GOP and she specifically mentions Cruz's Senate Conservative Fund. LINK.
This is from Newsmax:
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Ann Coulter says she supports the tea party but isn't convinced all the people who claim the title are legitimate.
"There are shysters," the conservative author said Wednesday on Fox News Channel's "Hannity." "Don't trust anyone saying they are trying to defeat 'establishment Republicans.'"
"Of course, I love the tea party," Coulter said, but she limits them mostly to people in the "heart of America" who want to see change. She said tea party groups such as the Senate Conservatives Fund are just trying to bilk donors.
Rather than focusing on defeating Republicans, the tea party should focus on getting a majority in the Senate, Coulter said.
"If it weren't for shysters running against 'establishment Republicans,' we would have 51 Republican Senators right now," she told host Sean Hannity. "One big election this year, and we would have a veto-proof majority. So thank you, shysters and con men."
Repealing Obamacare should be the tea party's main goal, Coulter said.
"Keep your eye on the ball. It is going to wreck the country," she said, adding that the healthcare law will not, as some Republicans believe, fall of its own weight.
"Public education sucks, and that hasn't fallen on its own," she said, and neither have the subway system, airport security, or the Internal Revenue Service.
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For the record, I'm glad that Ann sees this and I hope she understands it. I will, however, point out that she's been very guilty of this herself for about a year now. In any event, add this to the list of evidence of a sea change on the right.
Predictably, by the way, the comments to the article blast her for missing the real enemy... RINOS!! (Which apparently includes Sean Hannity now.)
Okay, we should stop beating up on the government. It is mean and bad...[shhhhh, the NSA IRS division is listening]
Oh, btw did you hear that the Farmers' Almanac has trumped the official government agency - Climate Prediction Center of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration - in accurately predicted the weather?
Using the same methods used since the first publication in 1818, they have been accurate 80% of time over the nearly 200 years. And this year is no exception - they accurately predicted a ."“a colder-than-normal winter for two-thirds of the country and heavy snowfall in the Midwest, Great Lakes and New England.” They also predicted that there would be a major snow event during the Super Bowl in NY/NJ. They were wrong by...one day.
The government-run Climate Prediction Center of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration uses settled scientific methods and they are about as accurate as throwing a dart at chart with "Colder than Normal", "No Change", and "Hotter than Normal" as the only choices. The dart fell on “above normal from November through January across much of the lower 48 states.”
Uh, Ann, ABOUT FREAKIN' TIME you started seeing the light. She was just as bad as anyone with Romney. NOW she sees the big picture...geez.
Tryanmax - Patrick Stewart has a great sense of humor about himself. And he famously just married a woman half his age last summer. He also said something like it was a nice change of pace from reading that he was dead.
Bev, It's things like Ann's epiphany that give me hope. I'm seeing more and more conservatives starting to realize that the fringe is a menace, not an ally. With each one, we get closer to saving conservatism.
As for not beating up the government, "them first."
Bev and tryanmax, Stewart really does have a great sense of humor.
The sooner clowns disappear the better. Mimes too. ((shudder))
Ah, Koshcat, you must be a member of a club I started while in Drama School - the NoMoMimes. or maybe you're coulrophobic. I haven't really trusted clowns since "Poltergeist" and I will never, ever look under my bed at night. {{{shudderx2}}}
Bev, If you want revenge for the Poltergeist clown, then watch Scary Movie 2... it's an hilarious scene! NSFW
Bev - if you dislike Mime, you might like the movie: Shakes the Clown. Very funny.
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