20 Words They Apparently Can't Say At Huffpo

HuffPo had an article about 20 words that people use “to try to make themselves look smart” but which make them look stupid because they misuse them. Now, let me start by saying that anyone who thinks using these words will make you “look smart” is a raving moron. These are basic, simple words which dumb people just mistake for other words. Here’s the list.

● Accept v. Except
“Except for morons, most people get that liberalism is bullshit.”

● Affect v. Effect
“The corrosive effect of liberalism will affect us all.”

● Lie v. Lay
“Bill Clinton is always up for a good lie... or a good lay.”

● Bring v. Take
“Bring us your money, or we will take it.” (IRS Manual)

● Ironic v. Coincidental
“It’s ironic that liberals, who claim to worship science, can’t tell the difference between coincidence and causation.”

● Imply v. Infer
“I infer from the stupidity you are trying to imply that you are a liberal.”

● Nauseous v. Nauseated
“Liberals are nauseous creatures, whose hypocrisy nauseates me.”

● Comprise v. Compose
“Liberalism comprises a whole lot of hateful pet peeves, which all together compose their idiotic ideology.”

● Farther v. Further
“Luke, I am your further.”

● Fewer v. Less
“The less I think, the fewer problems I see with liberal solutions.”

Nice work, Huffpo. Aim high.

Anyways, as you can see, these are not words people use to sound smart unless they are raving morons. But there ARE words that morons use to try to sound smart and they misuse them badly. Here are just a few off the top of my head:

● Investment. Liberals think this word means “spending.” It does not. It actually means using one’s money in a way that is likely to generate more money.

● Millionaire. Liberals think this word means anyone who earns more than $200,000 a year. It actually means anyone who possesses more than a million dollars.

● Poverty. Liberals think this means anyone in the bottom 15% of the nation’s income base. It actually means living in really shitty conditions because you are poor. See e.g., Africa, Venezuela, the Middle East, any other place where socialism worked its wonders.

● Revenue. Liberals think this means whatever money the government can take from its citizens. This word actually means money you “earn” from providing your labor or selling your assets.

● Universal Coverage. Liberals think this means covering all but 15% of the population. It actually means covering everyone.

● Climate Change. Liberals think this means evil billionaire industrialists driving around with smokers and pick axes trying to destroy the world with pollution, over-mining (like on Praxis), child labor, a low minimum wage, racism, lack of gun control, religious terrorism (Christian only), harsh language directed at college students, freedom of choice in education, uneven earning potential, and all around meanie-ism. It actually means changes in the Earth’s climate brought about by vast forces far beyond our control... like the sun.

● Racism. Liberals think this means being white. It actually means acting against a person on the basis of their race.

● Free Speech. Liberals think this means making sure that everyone has appropriate thoughts. It actually means letting people speak their own thoughts, whatever they are, without punishment.

● Free Speech. Liberals think it means having the right to force other people to listen to you on your terms. It actually means only having the right to speak, but without any promise that others will listen.

● Nazism. Liberals think this is an ideology akin to libertarianism. It’s actually just one flavor of socialism... like progressivism.

● Terrorism. Liberals think this means GOP elected officials disagreeing with Obama. Under no circumstances does it mean Islamic radicals torturing and murdering women, children, gays or Christians. It actually means... you know what? Forget it. They will never understand this one.

Thoughts?