Saturday, August 28, 2021

Thank God For Biden

Thank God Biden is president. Without him, we would be in a real mess.

I mean, we might have out-of-control inflation. But Biden assures us the worst inflation in 30 years is only temporary. If it wasn't for that assurance, I would worry that we're repeating 1981 all over again. But that was 30 years ago, so no worries.

Biden killed that guy too, the one who helped plan the deaths of 13 Marines and 170 Afghans. Sure, the numbers seem skewed but he was a planner. He's the one who told that guy to wear a suicide vest and go where all the foreigners are huddle together. Without him, no one would have figured that out. I must say, I am satisfied. And it's not like Biden's total f-ups caused the situation either. Plus, it felt all machoee to hear his press chick look at the camera and tell us in firm, harsh language that Biden wants whoever is responsible for the nearly 200 deaths to no longer live on this earth. Oh, I feel all dirty, but in a good way.

... And yes, I'm sure this was the right guy. I mean, who else could it be? Besides, Biden would never lie. Plus, I'm sure he was clinging to life on earth rather than some fantasy land about virgins in paradise, so this was serious punishment. Yup, I am satisfied.

Biden stopped COVID too. I mean, there aren't more Americans in hospitals now than at any time during the pandemic, right? And ICU beds aren't filled to such a degree that non-Covid patients are dying from being turned away.

Plus, we cannot deny that he gave us comfort on the origins of Covid. They aren't sure if the Chinese made it or if some Chinese guy got it intercoursing a monkey, but Biden has concluded that even if the Chinese made it, they absolutely did not make it as part of a biological weapon. No siree, they made it as a party favor. I feel safer already.

At least he's asked questions like what Google was doing funding this lab... well, he may ask that question... someday.

He handled that Hurricane in Haiti well though. Doing nothing was just the trick. Just like in Tennessee. Some might say a President owes some attention to flooding victims but Biden says "f*k that."

At least he's protecting tenants... oops. I meant, keeping unemployment benefits going... uh. Would you believe lightening the load of college debt... for a select few?

The Europeans do love him. That's a fact... was a fact. Not so much now. Oh, and if you want to see Europe, go now. They're closing the borders for us again.

You know, I see your doubtful looks and all I can say is you are wrong. Biden killed a man and that's cool. He took an eye for 366 eyes. He made America sound tough and that's all that counts. The world shook. And so what if he went on vacation as Afghanistan burned. It's not like he played golf. He solved Covid outside of Florida. Stranding Europe in Afghanistan? Well, they shouldn't have been there in the first place! And Haiti? F*k Haiti, it's full of Haitians. Who needs that? Screw landlords and tenants too, they're all big corporations. Screw Europe too. As for Covid, it's only Trump supporters getting it, so screw them. And that guy with the monkey? He had it coming. Stop picking on Biden! Give him credit for the good things he's done. His son and wife died. Died! You can't criticize a man whose wife died! And his other son is a saint. A SAINT! Leave Biden alone. So he stages his press conferences and gets pissed when people ask him questions he didn't approve. And his VP is an incompetent cackler. Stop judging! It's hard enough just finding a way into the White House. And it's not like Biden has gotten to relax and sniff any women or children in months!

So just stop. Let the man be.


tryanmax said...

I wonder if “Leave him alone” was the plan all along? Did Dems get so drunk on their own Kool-Aid they thought they could run the parade of victims all the way into the Oval Office? Would they have made Greta Thunberg president if they could’ve?

AndrewPrice said...

Ok, so we got TWO guys... not just one. This one was a "facilitator", which means he owned the goat they road to the attack. Call me impressed.

AndrewPrice said...

tryanmax, I think old Democrats stuck them with Biden and they hoped he would get to sit quietly behind the desk for four years and then retire or die. I don't think any of them expected him to really have to work, and then they definitely didn't expect him to be this terrible.

AndrewPrice said...

Good test for the left's integrity... excuse me while I laugh. The left's integrity? Oh my, that's a good one.

Anyways, Biden's missile strike killed three kids. Will the left condemn him? You know they would have condemned Trump. But then, they don't care about what you do so much as who does it.

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