Thursday, July 27, 2017

OMG! What happened?

Put down your drinks so you don't spit them all over your computer. Hillary's new book will arrive like a turd from 30,000 feet in book stores on September 12. In this book she will finally explain why she lost the 2016 race... not to be confused with why she lost the 2008 race. Oy vey.

For starters, here is how the book is being described:
"Clinton chronicles her stunning defeat in the 2016 presidential election, a race marked by rage, sexism, exhilarating highs and infuriating lows, stranger-than-fiction twists, Russian interference, and an opponent who broke all the rules."
Does this strike anyone as oddly similar to Eddie Valliant describing what was happening in Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
"I'm gonna listen to you spin the Cloverleaf scenario. The story of greed, sex and murder. And the parts that I don't like, I'm gonna edit out."
According to Hillary's intro, this is why you should buy the book:
“In the past, for reasons I try to explain (Yoda: "That is why you fail, do or do not. There is no try."), I’ve often felt I had to be careful in public (Having an overactive bladder will do that to you.), like I was up on a wire without a net. (Life is a circus.). Now I’m letting my guard down. (I'm going commando!)”
Anyways, for those of you wanting to know what to expect. The book will basically be a list of all the people Hillary blames for her loss. She will deal with one person per page. The book is 4.2 million pages long.

Naturally, the internet is already poking fun at her ridiculous title, which is openly ambiguous in how you want to read it, lacks context because Hillary assumes everyone is still wondering what happened, and not at all clever:
They are also pointing out that she might be missing a few topics:
Anyways, we have an excerpt that might interest you.
"I got screwed. It's everyone else's fault. It takes a village to get democracy right. We need to take all the children away and raise them in a village now where they will be taught to worship me."
That's about all we can share without making readers sterile. So pick the book up, it will be a tortured, horrific, whiny confession of how everyone else screwed Hillary.


Critch said...

I'm on the edge of my chair...

Anthony said...

Hillary is devoid of belief (other than a belief in her right to power), competence, charisma and integrity. That alone would have doomed her in a sane world. Even worse she was following the disastrous Obama and thus was swimming against the now Republican wave.

That being said I still subscribe to the theory I crafted during the election that both candidates were intensely repellant to big chunks of the public so the one who got the most coverage lost.

Most of the election that person was Trump (which is why I nicknamed him Hillary's Hope) but after some in a long string of sloppily handled Clinton emails turned up a few weeks before the election and triggered an FBI probe Trump took a rare break from going after Gold Star families, Mexican judges and John McCain's military record and let the media and everyone else focus on Hillary.

I am sure in her book Hillary will blame everyone but herself. She is utterly terrible.

LL said...

I wouldn't take the book for free and use it as a doorstop. But that's just me.

Anonymous said...

I'm torn. On the one hand I don't want to give her any money. On the other, this is going to be an incredible look into a narcissistic mind.

Anonymous said...

They can use it to train psychologists.

BevfromNYC said...

Oh, sorry I'm late. I was standing in line at the bookstore to buy my copy! I just can't wait to see if I have a page in her book!!! Maybe she'll sign my page!!! The anticipation is killing me...

tryanmax said...

I fixed the book cover: LINK

AndrewPrice said...

tryanmax, She should have called it: "Despicable Thee"

tryanmax said...

"Despicable Thee" Ha!

Anonymous said...

tryanmax - Hilarious! How about this. At this point, what does it matter?

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