Thursday, June 8, 2017

Trumped Up Headlines

With Britain looking like it plans to elect its own Bernie Sanders and commit mass suicide, let's ignore reality and have some fun.

Here is some bad news for the left that has come up in the past few days.
1. Hillary Clinton owned slaves while in Arkansas... as did Bill.

2. Comey confirms that Obama's Attorney General tried to influence FBI to drop Hillary investigation.

3. Socialists may actually take power in Britain... "good God what will we be blamed for now?"

4. Bernie supporter arrested for espionage.

5. Bernie supporter kills two people after attacking Muslims. Likely Bernie supporter steals wedding ring from dead hero.

6. Arabs care as much about terrorism as the rest of us... except the Saudi national soccer team refused to participate in a moment of silence to honor the London terrorism victims. Apparently, killing infidels isn't a sin, so participating made no sense.

7. Vegan diets cause kids to fall behind in school... drinking almond milk instead of regular milk results in children being 1.5 centimeters shorter.

8. The Wonder Woman characters was invented by some dude into S&M.
Not good, not good. But we can do better. Let's come up with some leftist headlines. What is a leftist headline? It's what you see at all the leftist news sites: lies, distortions, painful mental gymnastics, all to make their worldview make sense. Here are some examples:
Unemployment down, but white men benefit!

Employment rises, but are jobs healthy?

Trump saves children from drowning... how many will grow up to be rapists?

Fat stripper responds to troll, and we are inspired.

Bastion of free speech, Harvard cancels admissions of ten students who tell jokes the left doesn't like.

Could absence of anti-Trump evidence at Congressional Hearing be the smoking gun?
How about yours?

21 comments:

tryanmax said...

More women than men graduate college, and that's a problem for women.

tryanmax said...

Exclusive: Inside the support group for journalists blocked by Trump on Twitter.

AndrewPrice said...

LOL! That is too real, tryanmax. I can see that one as a totally real headline. I can even hear the arguments:

"It's unfair to women that there are so many women competing for jobs... women are left with more debt... this is setting expectations for women too high... it devalues the achievement of women."

Ouch, my brain!

BevfromNYC said...

"Did the Marshall Plan work too well? German Chancellor Angela Merkel poised to be new 'Leader of the Free World'".

tryanmax said...

Found this on the Twitters; appropriate for today's game:

Comey leaked, Bill Clinton's tarmac meeting affected the probe, Lynch pressured the FBI, NYT & CNN were wrong.

Headlines: Trump Has Bad Day

BevfromNYC said...

"Labor Wins Kinda'! Promise To Appoint Mayor of London Sadiq Khan Prime Minister!"

BevfromNYC said...

My favorite question was from Marco Rubio yesterday "Do you ever wonder why, of all the things in this investigation, the only thing that's never been leaked is the fact that the president was not personally under investigation, despite the fact that Democrats and Republicans and the leadership of Congress knew that and have known that for weeks?"

tryanmax said...

People are starting to call him "J. Edgar Comey."

BevfromNYC said...

The parents who named their child "Reality Winner", must be regretting that choice about now...

AndrewPrice said...

Bev, People like that don't regret their mistakes because they never understand them as mistakes. They just see themselves as being unfairly treated.

AndrewPrice said...

tryanmax, That's because he's a tyrannical cross-dresser. ;-)

AndrewPrice said...

Bev, Rubio makes a great point.

AndrewPrice said...

So now the Daily Mail is running a story accusing JFK of being gay. Apparently, any male in history who had a male friend or a male roommate will now be deemed gay after they have died. Pathetic.

BevfromNYC said...

It's true. If you are a man and have ever lived with any man...well, it doesn't matter that JFK tried to sleep with every woman who came within 2 feet of him though.

Anthony said...

That Bill Cosby trial is horrifying. He talked a good game about morality (I have quoted him more than once) but based on his own testimony (given during a prior trial) is clearly a creep.

ArgentGale said...

Haha, nicely done on the headlines... Unfortunately my brain's too fried to contribute something witty myself (thanks to some government dumbf***ery no less). On the leaker apparently she changed her name from Sara to Reality, which should tell you even more about her. Somehow I'm not surprised on the Daily Mail thing either... It seems like articles and the like overanalyzing real people and fictional characters so that they can claim that they're gay has increased over the years. I don't think the general public buys any of this stuff and it's likely just the same old group that's always been into this stuff writing it; it's just that social media and other sites have given them a bigger platform to throw this stuff out there. The Cosby trial is definitely sad and disturbing, too.

- Daniel

AndrewPrice said...

Batman has died.

RIP Adam West

Anthony said...

RIP. Adam West always seemed like he was having fun.

ArgentGale said...

That he did, Anthony, and he'll be missed. Also, Andrew, did you get the e-mail I sent you?

- Daniel

AndrewPrice said...

Daniel, Is that the one from earlier or was there another?

ArgentGale said...

It was the one from earlier that you answered. Sorry, this whole thing's just thrown me off badly.

- Daniel

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