Friday, February 15, 2013

The Green Movement: Anti-Everything

It's no secret around these parts that the environmental movement has beclowned itself over and over again, especially the really fringe elements. But they're even more nuts than you'd think, as we'll see below. I also have to come clean about something. Sorry.

So there are a lot of people in the world. And most environmentalists say that's a bad thing. But lots of people are also pet owners, which means at least some animals--cats, dogs, boa constrictors, etc.--ought to avoid extinction and the consequences of us raping Mother Earth pretty easily (as should all those houseplants). And that's a good thing. Right? Well, not so much, it seems.

At least, that's what New Zealand economist Gareth Morgan believes. In an interview last month, Morgan said that cats, in their way, are just as damaging to the environment as evil Homo sapiens. See, felines, if you weren't already aware of this, have a tendency to attack and kill birds (and then proudly leave the mangled remains on your doorstep). In New Zealand, a land with some very diverse native wildlife, this has supposedly led to the endangerment or extinction of numerous bird species. Probably there was a lot more at work than that, but sure, we'll say cats' predatory instincts didn't help. And of course, everyone wants to protect the beautiful rare birds. Morgan has a fairly simple proposal on how to do this: Kill all cats.

Okay, to be fair, Morgan didn't say that exactly. That would be twisting his words around, which is wrong. He merely suggested that it would be a good idea if:

a) all cats in the country were tagged;
b) all cats found wandering off their owners' property be confiscated;
c) said confiscated cats be euthanized by the authorities unless their owners claim them, in which case they have to pay a fine;
d) the government subsidize all this euthanasia; and
e) owners thus deprived of their pets be "encouraged" not to get a replacement feline.

See, he's totally not saying "Kill all cats."

Now, I have a slight admission to make before I go any further. As it happens....I love cats. Always have. I mean, come on! They're just so adorable when they purr or stretch out on the couch and they're so fluffy and cute when they're little kittens and--okay, that's getting too mushy. Anyway, point is, no, I do not kill cats in my spare time, nor have I ever done so. Sorry to disillusion you guys. But like all cat lovers, you can imagine that I did not take the opinion of this "expert" very well. And frankly, I don't have to give a scientific reason why I didn't. This is one of those examples of irrational, emotionally-based decisions sometimes counting for a lot. Of course cats (and other domesticated animals, not to mention mice and rats) have upset many ecosystems into which they've been introduced, sometimes very destructively. That doesn't mean I'm going to value "restoring the natural balance" over my kittycat. I just don't care about it to that degree.

And look, here's the thing: It's not the case that when humans and their accompanying critters encounter a previously untouched land, they're seeing it in its "pristine" state. No such condition exists, or has ever existed. Nature, as more reflective environmentalists might realize, has always been in a state of flux. Every ecosystem, humans or no, cats or no, has been upset at some point in its past, and in some sense, every species is an invasive one. Even the permanent-looking California redwoods have only been a part of their current habitat for the past few thousand years, which as anyone will tell you is a mere blip from the whole biosphere's point of view. To say that cats running loose among the native bird population, however regrettable that might be in some ways, is the end of the world only shows that you don't fully understand that phrase.

But there's another way in which this exposes the strange and twisted logic of the green movement. As it has repeatedly demonstrated, the environmentalist Left is inherently anti-human in sentiment, and has been increasingly open about it. A former president of PETA made waves a few years ago by declaring, "When it comes to feelings, a rat is a pig is a dog is a boy. There is no rational basis for declaring that human beings have special rights." It doesn't require much effort to pick apart the import of this statement as far as we're concerned, but consider the logical outflow here. If humans and animals are implicitly equal and have the same right to live, and if humans don't have a right to live, at least not a right that trumps "protecting the environment," then it stands to reason that animals don't have a right to live, either. If any species is threatening the supposed balance of their ecosystem, then that species ought to be eliminated or at least cut down to size. And who will be doing the--ahem--reduction? Why, the self-appointed guardians of Mother Earth, of course. Just consider the past demands to shrink the number of cattle because of their methane production, or now this particular case. See how we've gone from saving Bambi to potentially killing Bambi? "Bleeding heart" liberals, my you-know-what.

Anyway, yeah I do like cats. So there's that.

46 comments:

T-Rav said...

For the record, yes, the hardest part about writing this was deciding what kitty picture to go with.

Koshcat said...

And yet, they are ok with killing multiple hawks and eagles in the name of "Green Energy". Assholes.

I like cats too. Especially how spectacularly effective predators they are.

AndrewPrice said...

You know, "beclowned" is a verb that doesn't get enough usage. :)

As for killing all the cats, I'm fine with it if we get cat owners too who decorate their cubicles with pictures of their cats... whoa, did I say that out loud?

Uh, yeah, an outrage!!

AndrewPrice said...

P.S. Killing vast numbers of animals, villages, Jews, poor people seems to be the liberal answer to most problems. You would think that such "enlightened people" would try to think of less genocidal answers first... but apparently not.

T-Rav said...

Kosh, yeah, there's that too. I forgot to mention that one. I'm curious as to whether they consider such incidents a bug or a feature.

T-Rav said...

Andrew, I'm rather fond of it. There's so much opportunity to use it. :-)

As for the people being killed, as long as we include whoever created the "I can haz cheeseburger?" meme, I'm okay with it.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav, One of the great things about mass murder is that once you start, it's really easy to include whoever you want... they're all secret enemies of the state anyway.

Tennessee Jed said...

There are too many people out there with too much time on their hands who let their imaginations run wild. Perhaps if we all donned loin clothes and howled at the moon.

Rainbow Six

T-Rav said...

Andrew, one of the popular sayings about the French Revolution in the Reign of Terror (kind of the starting point for modern totalitarian movements) was that Robespierre would have every Frenchman beheaded, and then behead the executioner. Once you get that taste of blood in your mouth, you can kinda go crazy.

T-Rav said...

Jed, you say "donned loin clothes and howled at the moon" like it's a bad thing.

Mr_Severus_Snape said...

"Anyway, point is, no, I do not kill cats in my spare time, nor have I ever done so."

Thanks for saying this! I feel better now... I think...

K said...

Well, the answer to the New Zealand cat problem is for Bill Gates to collect and air drop about 10,000 bobcats onto the islands and let them go to work. In no time all those stupid so called "endangered" species will be cleaned up and the country will be cat safe again.

You're welcome.

PS: Cats rule.

Patriot said...

T-Rav...I've got the perfect idea for an "Anti-Enviro" weapon. Find some way to get that gawd-awful cat box smell weaponized into a huge spray cannon, and then when we have demonstrations like Occupy Whatever, Green protests and the like, we spray this lethal smelling mist all over every one of the bastards. It won't kill them but maybe they'll re-assess their position!

As an additional bonus, we would then be able to identify, on smell, any lefties and greenies and treat them accordingly as we do whenever we enter someone's home that smells like an old, never cleaned cat box.

In fact, I'll be applying for the patent any day now, with my sister's house as the ultimate example.

P.S. Chocolate Labs Rule (They always use the neighbors yards to do their business!...at night when they can't be seen.)

tryanmax said...

Oh, T-Rav, your irrational emotionalism has caused you to miss the point altogether. You see, cats, dogs, boa constrictors, house plants and the like are just as bad as humans because they've aligned themselves with them. You might say they've "sold out to the man." Quite literally, in fact.

Koshcat said...

Patriot, that won't work because it wouldn't cover up the nasty BO and sandlewood odor.

K, I agree but was think more along the lines of coyotes. They are very effective in controlling cat population and can live just about anywhere.

T-Rav said...

Snape, I thought it was about time I retrieve my reputation. Now, that's not to say I'm not a psychotic nut job....just not one who kills cats.

T-Rav said...

K, I don't think that's exactly what the environmentalists had in mind. Although, with 10,000 bobcats around, there's sure to be a few human deaths, so maybe that will placate them somewhat.

If you were ever to encounter my mother's household, that would be proof that cats do, indeed, rule.

T-Rav said...

Patriot, interesting idea.

As an alternative, we could spray the Occupy protestors with lots of artificial catnip, then turn loose all the stray cats of the region, sit back, and enjoy the show.

I'll steer clear of the Cats/Chocolate Labs argument between you and K, except to say that my aunt's family used to own a Lab, and they are very adorable as well.

tryanmax said...

I guess some neighborhoods have a problem with Chocolate Labs and others have a problem with Meth Labs.

BevfromNYC said...

"Anyway, point is, no, I do not kill cats in my spare time, nor have I ever done so."

T-Rav - Just because you are using photos of adorable kittens does not mean I believe you. And furthermore, I think this is just a deflection to put us off the trail of your obvious super-secret kittie commando training facilities. The Russians did this kind of thing during the cold war.

But seriously, when I read this a few weeks ago, it made me laugh. Duh, they were surprised that cats kill vermin in great numbers. Really, ya' think? Now imagine if cats DIDN"T kill vermin. And you know what? Simple truth - Birds can fly; cats cannot fly (well maybe T-Rav's kittie commando flying unit can). If the birds are too stupid to fly away from the cats, then they deserve to become extinct. That is why they developed wings. Pure Darwinism at its best/worst. Next, these enviros will denounce Darwin and claim that the earth was created 6000 years ago.

And as for the blocking out the sun. It is good to know that Algore is not a complete moronic idiot. And just on its face, they are going to shoot chemicals into our upper atmosphere...isn't that the issue they claim is the problem with CO2 - chemicals in our atmosphere?

BevfromNYC said...

Mmmmmmm, chocolate labs. I want one in my nabe. I bet they smell a heckuva lot better than meth labs! But then, I bet people like Paris Hilton and one of those blasted Kardashians would show up in the middle of the night. I will stick with vodka.

T-Rav said...

tryanmax, good point. I guess those household pets are just part of the system. In that case, how far should the liquidation reach? Goldfish? Guinea pigs? Iguanas? We don't want any petty-bourgeois animals returning to corrupt Mother Earth, after all.

T-Rav said...

Hmmmm....Meth Labs. Yeah, that's a picture I could have done without seeing. Anyway, anyone who's been in the vicinity of a real meth lab knows they invariably keep pit bulls.

T-Rav said...

Bev, I'm innocent, I swear! 0:-) Of shooting cats in the face, that is. As far as developing secret commando units goes....well, let's just say you'd better be nice to me.

I know you're being a little tongue-in-cheek about Darwin, but really--these people clearly have not thought through what they're advocating. That, or they don't care and they just want to use it as an excuse to get more control. Anyone who's seriously considered how nature works knows that there is no pristine condition; every species on Earth today has pushed out another one.

And the sun-blocking thing is just ludicrous. Scientists can't even agree on what effect that would have on the climate; I thought we were supposed to, you know, follow the science? Or something?

rlaWTX said...

I KNEW IT!!!!!!!
I mean, um, well, T-Rav is such a nice virtual entity that the addition of kitten-killer in his virtual persona had to be a red herring!

Ok, so, my avatar had a talk with the BREs and they told her that they thought you were just hiding your true kitty feelings, and they also let slip that they had seen the kitty commando training site... just sayin' :)

as for the killer kitties - duh! However, I recognize that it is not ideal that these localized species get the Darwin treatment, so keeping kitties close to home and spaying/neutering them are grand ideaa. The rest - not so much.

T-Rav said...

Aw, thanks, rla!

Actually, the "persona" has kind of a funny backstory (one Andrew would appreciate): back when the Twilight movie Eclipse came out, a couple months before I started commenting here, I read an online review which said that the movie was chock full of "vampires, werewolves, and Kristen Stewart looking like someone just shot her kitten in the face." Me, reading this: "Heh. That's a funny line. I'm going to have to remember that." And the rest is history.

So, we owe the longest-running joke in Commentarama history to the fact that Ms. Stewart is a terrible actress. Funny how the world works.

rlaWTX said...

personally, I think that critic was a bit overly kind in that comment - that assumes [1] there was a recognizable emotion on her face and [2] she maintained said emotion for the course of the film.

K said...

The best book I ever read about the enviro movement was Ron Arnold and Alan Gottlieb's book - "Trashing the Economy".

It was written by two conservationists who call out the difference between conservationism and enviromentalism. It's a long book and a little outdated now(1993) but it details the nest of environmental organizations that have acted like parasites on the economy for decades now. It also details the environmental mindset which they characterize as "... to hell with you all".

AndrewPrice said...

Bev, What have you got against meth labs? :P

BevfromNYC said...

Andrew - What do I have againt meth labs? They cost too much to ru...er...they smell.

BevfromNYC said...

My solution to this whole killer cat evironmental problem is to stop dressing cats up in silly costumes! Seriously, don't you know that everytime someone dresses their cat up like a elf or frog or some other humiliating costume, it just intensifies their serial killer instincts and they plot their revenge! And you know they stare at you while you sleep, right?

T-Rav said...

rla, I don't know about a specific emotion, but whatever was on her face, she definitely didn't change it for the duration of the film.

T-Rav said...

K, that's an important distinction, and one reason I tried to emphasize "environmentalist Left." Speaking strictly for myself, as the proud product of a very rural community, I hate urban sprawl and industrial grime almost as much as any greenie could. I like having woods and fields and wildlife and want to see them preserved. But, there's a difference between that and what they're implicitly trying to do, which is level down humanity to the status of "just another animal," micromanage world affairs, and drastically reduce our standard of living. That's not okay; like I said, it's just plain anti-human. So a distinction definitely needs to be drawn.

T-Rav said...

Bev, that doesn't bother me. I stare right back at them while I sleep.

And the real problem with meth labs is that to keep them operating, you have to go busting open ammonia tanks in the middle of nowhere, and then the farmers take to putting security on them, and then.....er, I mean, yeah, you're right. They smell really bad.

tryanmax said...

Conservatives should reclaim the term "conservation." I remember that term from my (not to distant) youth. It's still a good word, isn't it?

tryanmax said...

Wait, I'm confused. Chocolate labs are the brown ones, that's easy enough. But ammonia is yellow, so does that mean the yellow ones are the meth labs?

rlaWTX said...

yes, tryanmax, conservatives should retake "conservation" - they sound tailor-made for one another!

BevfromNYC said...

But ammonia is yellow, so does that mean the yellow ones are the meth labs?

We prefer the word "golden" to "yellow", but yes.

BevfromNYC said...

rla and Tryanmax - That is an excellent platform item - conservation.

T-Rav said...

tryanmax, we used to get a magazine, the "Missouri Conservationist," when I was a kid. Lots of deer-hunting, talking about various tree diseases, neat caves to check out, etc. Nothing liberal or hippy-dippy about it.

So yes, we should definitely reclaim that concept.

T-Rav said...

Bev and tryanmax, I couldn't tell you. Once you use meth long enough, the colors all start to run together and fade out.

BevfromNYC said...

T-Rav - My experience says you are righ...no I know nothing of this at all ever at all (did I just already say that?). Hey! Look over there! Kitties with purple umbrellas!

T-Rav said...

Bev, don't be stupid. Those umbrellas are made out of ducks, and everyone knows ducks aren't purple!

BevfromNYC said...

T-Rav - Oh, pee-shah! Everyone knows kitties do NOT like duck feathers whatever color they are! Allergies, you know...

Individualist said...

Probelm with killing cats can be found in an Australian Folk song I heard.

Oh the cat came back
the very next day
the cat came back
and it wouldn't go away

Meow Kitty, Meow so Pretty
Meow such a Pity but the cat came back.

The song is about someone killing the same cat over and over again and it never quite working.

Individualist said...

So All I have to say to you cat killing genocidal envirowacko's out there is

Good luck with that....

Post a Comment