Sunday, September 23, 2018

A Drone Without Guidance

From the corner of my darkened room... hugging my knees...

I ended my decades long boycott of Nike over their labor practices in foreign countries. Something about child labor... I'm not sure. I bought the Nikes because they hired Colvin Kaepernack as their CEO, something which upset the hateful conservatives I know. He hates America and that's patriotic, so I needed to support him. I felt so proud.

Today, I learn that Nike gives three times as much to Republicans as they give to Democrats. I'm boycotting In and Out Burger because they give to racist Republicans. I feel I should boycott Nike now too, but I need to support Colvin Kaepernack in his quest to prove how racist America is.

What should I do? Should I burn something? Tell me who to hate! Why doesn't someone tell me what I deeply believe?!! Why doesn't somebody do something?!!


AndrewPrice said...

Hmm. There is an actress named Brie Larson... Brie Larson... Brie is a cheese. Larson means to steal. Steal cheese. Odd.

tryanmax said...

“Why doesn't someone tell me what I deeply believe?!!”


AndrewPrice said...

Thanks! Talking to liberals, it seems accurate.

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